Father’s Day

I am a father due to the fact that I have kids. This makes anybody a father except for moms who are mothers for the same reason. It is a day to tell fathers that they are appreciated by giving them cards. Hardly anybody gives ties anymore that I know of, even though that’s the big joke of it. Most people just give cards which cost maybe under five bucks. Even bad ties cost more than most people think Father’s Day is worth. So dads usually end up getting cards which are nicer than ties even if you can’t exactly wear them to show them off.

I have solved this issue by using sticky tacky to stick my cards to the front of my car. I drive around town with my window down and when I come to a stop light I yell out the window for people to come look at my cards quick before the light turns. Some people don’t listen to me, but a couple have stopped over to look. If they take too long I just honk and rev my motor and they mostly get out of the way. So it isn’t really my fault about that old lady since she was probably hard of hearing. Anyway, this is my way of thanking my kids for the cards who don’t usually come with me when I drive my cards around, which is funny since you think they would like to know how much I like those cards.

Sometimes we have a barbeque in honor of fathers which I am one of. I will stand by the grill and burn meat while everybody else sits and pigs out and mostly forgets it’s Father’s Day anyway and just eat like it was any day having a barbeque. I don’t mind it mostly because I am a humble person through and through and can stand over that grill without noticing that nobody is paying any attention to me except when they want to know how come the meat is taking so long or how come it’s burned to a crisp. It’s a pretty good system if you ask me about it.

This year I was told that we’re doing lasagna.

Oh, and not only that, my dad is here for Father’s Day too. He is almost 90 years old but he can still get on my nerves like when he was in his fifties. He lives in North Dakota which I am going to go visit this summer mostly because I like to get on his nerves every so often too. I will write about my visit to North Dakota when it happens so I won’t do it now since it hasn’t happened yet. I don’t just make stuff up like other lame blogs do. Anyway, my dad is pretty okay as far as 90 year guys go. He used to be a vice president of a university before he retired so you would think he’d appreciate the way I can think above my mind but I don’t think he’s all that impressed. He’s got this old-time idea (which is not exactly a concept in my opinion) that I should have “made something of myself.” Due to the fact that he’s old I mostly ignore him on that but sometimes it’s hard especially when he asks me what I actually do for a living. How can you explain to your dad that you are above those kinds of things now? I had him read some stuff from this great blog but I think it just made matters worse. So, like I said, I just ignore him on that.

Anyway, if you have kids and are not a mom, happy Father’s Day. Otherwise not.


One Response

  1. Being a searching person, and receiving notification coincidentally of your blog, while not believing in coincidencuality because it’s all synchronicity, I went and searched, then researched all of your blog.

    I discovered, although re-discovered is probably a better word, that I too am a megapsychological thinking being who is here having a physical experiment, and I think it would be in order for the world to thank you for your in- and outsights into how it is all put together, which it isn’t really, as it is all figments of imagination – although that really makes it real, seeing as how imagination is the strongest force in this non-existent universe.

    Anyway, even if your were to be given a medal for it, you would probably disdain the medal, not needing material rewards, but then you wouldn’t openly disdain it, not wanting to hurt people’s feelings, so maybe you could put it on your mantelpiece, or something.

    Anyway, thanks. That’s all I need to say. If you knew all the thoughts and feelings that went into that one word, you would know what I think and feel about it.

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