I think maybe I am a hyperchondriac. This is a big word that I found when I looked up “I think I’m dying probably” on Google. When I came across it, I knew that I was that. Except for the fact that somebody who is a hyperchondriac only thinks they are dying and I am pretty sure that I am really dying probably. Hyperchondriacs are dying only in their imaginations, but as you know if you have been following this great blog, I think above my mind which keeps me safe from imaginational things like that. My dying is probably real as I said. It could take awhile, but that doesn’t alter the issue even one bit.

Here are some of the evidence of the fact of it.

First, I can hear my heart beating. I know it’s supposed to be beating, but you’re not supposed to know it is due to the fact of the sound of it. Except for after freaking out like finding a gang of squirrels plotting against you or something like that. This is normal. But the other times you are not supposed to know your heart is beating. So I am hearing my heart beat which is not a great thing because then you know your whole life is dependent on that pounding muscle in your chest keeping on pounding all the time without stopping even once. That is not what you want to be thinking about let me tell you. It’s like hanging by a thread I’m telling you. So I think it’s an omen toward me.

I also have weirdness in myself. It feels like something is not normal, which is what weirdness is. But if somebody asks you what you mean by it, you can’t answer. This is mostly due to the fact that weirdness is not explainable by normal which is everything else that is not weird. So I’m not going to try to explain the weirdness thing.

I also have aches and pains that show up for no good reason. This morning I woke up and both may calves where paining me. By the way, why do we call them calves? That is a strange thing. Did somebody look at their legs and think that they looked like baby cows or something? Anyway, they pained me and I didn’t even have a reason for it.

I also have clogging issues which I’m not going to go into. This is not something a person talks about in polite situations except maybe if you’re a proctorist at a convention. So I’m only going to say that sometimes I’m not firing on all carbs, but you can bet I”m not going to make a pubic service announcement about it.

I am not going to make a whole list of things here, but just enough to let you know that I am a definite hyperchondriacal individual. I am not bragging about it one bit due to the fact that this is not something to be proud of. I am only hoping that you will learn from something about this in your own life, which is good because my life is most likely going to be shorter than normal probably if this keeps up


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